Reviewed by Richard Lee Zuras

Released Jan. 16, 2009

1 hr. 31 min.

PG

Steve Carr/Columbia Pictures

Kevin James

Bobby Cannavale

Jayma Mays

Peter Gerety

Keir O’Donnell

Odd as it might be to fathom, Paul Blart was/is a heavily marketed vehicle film for Kevin James. Albeit that the vehicle employed truly is a Segway. But a Segway is exactly the kind of vehicle the Kevin James from The King of Queens should be employing for comic effect. And make no mistake here: If you were not amused by James’ character Doug Heffernan in Queens’ 206 episodes—you won’t be amused here.

This is not a risk taking film by any stretch of the imagination. James, and many folks you’ve probably never even seen before, spend 90 minutes setting up the usual self-deprecating comedy/angry with no actual anger hi-jinx you’ve come to expect from this gentle giant of a comedian. Comedians like this (think Louie Anderson if you are a little older) have a niche. You either like this character and want to see it again…or you don’t. So when you reach my bottom line feel free to subtract up to a half point if you tired of the Doug Heffernan shtick, or add a half point if you find yourself watching Queens re-runs on a daily basis.

The film’s set-up is what I find most interesting. The film is clearly ripping off (or spoofing if you want to cut slack, out of the goodness of your heart) the Die Hard series. Rather than an office building or an airport, our “cop” is stuck (though the film missed many chances to play out the physical comedy of “stuck”) within a shopping mall. This allows massive amounts of product placement, store names, and the obligatory references to treating our cell-phones as if they were a deity of sorts. (Those familiar with Queens will remember that every other shot contained a prominent ad for Nike.)

Furthermore this is what we have become, and we all know it: a nation of consumers. The idea of placing Die Hard in a large mall, and placing a man who in his early 40’s needs to utilize a Segway rather than his own legs to outrun the bad guys? Brilliant. The idea of ninja-ing up the bad guys and placing them on BMX and decks to attract the umbilical-gaming crowd? Brilliant. Use Guitar Hero prominently in the script (with a nod to Rock Hero as well)? Brilliant. Show the audience the importance of our hero getting in the technology game? You guessed it.

Still, the movie has a heart—in large part due to the sheer abilities James brings to the role. James was a wrestler and football player in his formative years—and even at his current size he remains quite nimble, agile, and even graceful. Those who regularly watched Queens will remember his physical stunts and will not be surprised at his exploits herein. In the end, this film is poised to easily quadruple its budget—which is good news to its co-writer: Kevin James.

Bottom line 3.0/5.0